11.26.2006posted by Sean Messenger at 5:49 PM
(by Sean Newman, Pickup 101 Senior Instructor)
The dreaded death of mojo.
We all face it.
You wake up and the first thing you think is "I have to go back out there and do it again."
Doesn't matter if you've been picking up girls your whole life, or if you just started. The strong pull to do nothing never goes away.
Entropy. The tendency of ordered systems to fall apart and settle into inactivity.
Sloth. The desire to stay in bed and do, as we all learned from "Office Space," nothing. Absolutely. Nothing.
But the girls are out there. They are there every morning getting coffee, waiting for trains and busses, walking to work, walking their dogs, doing stuff. Commerce. Activity. Life.
And you know that when you are having a good day, it can be easy to just strike up that flirty conversation and spark something. We've all had at least one night, maybe with good friends at a party, or a bar you really like, when it seems like no thing to turn your volume up a little bit more and run your silly fun little lines on the cutie who catches your eye.
We all already have mojo. But we don't control when it's on, and when it's off.
What do you do on those days when your mojo is sleeping?
How do you wake it the fuck up?
Here's are the 5 Fixes I use to get myself going every day.
It doesn't matter how long you've been doing this or how good you are at it. Remember, the best pickup artists in the world don't even think of it as pickup. It's not something they do. It's just something they are, every minute, every day.
Do these five things, and you'll peg your switch to ON all the time, and you'll never let an opportunity pass by again.
1. Say Hi to people and give smiles every single day.
Simple smiles and greetings, especially in places where that is not expected, change the way you feel. When you talk, you are out of your head. And your head is a very comfortable, but lonely, place to be. If you're only motivation for doing pickup is to bust a nut, you'll never be happy. But if you can consider that being a nicer, friendlier person is a gift to others, it takes the pressure off you.
2. Flirt before noon.
I don't wait for Friday or Saturday night to roll around. I schedule visits to places every morning where I know I'll run into cute girls, so I can keep approaching and keep re-enforcing good habits and good results.
The nice thing about flirting with girls in the daytime is that all you need is one banter line, and you are almost always going to get a smile.
3. Walk, and walk with a purpose.
Be aware of your body language every day. If you catch yourself feeling nervous or stressed, get up and walk around. Force a smile onto your face. Breathe deep and slow. Get moving.
4. When in doubt, just make her smile.
Every passionate relationship begins with the man doing something to make the woman feel good. There are lots of ways to start this... banter and teasing, sexy eye contact, or absolute sincerity. If you get stuck, or in your head, stop thinking about it as a pickup, and set your goal just at making her smile. Be selfless. You are a gift you share with women.
5. Go back to basics.
Instead of trying to run a scripted 20-minute stack, just do the pieces. Go back to warmups like you learned in Art of Attraction. Stop cute girls and ask them what time it is. Willfully lose yourself in the city so you can ask directions.
And when you really need a karmic boost, go with the old standard sincere compliment.
"I know this is a little random, but I had to tell you that you are very cute."
Start it by acknowledging that what you are about to do is a bit unusual. This shows your social intelligence and puts her at ease. Then tell her just what you think. Every healthy man finds attractive girls cute. There's always something there that catches her eye. And you know she spends most of her time and money working on it.
So tell her. Be a man who makes his world better, and you will find the world making things better for you.
These five fixes may sound a little too basic. I know, you want the super-advanced magic words to make panties just melt right off her thighs.
The truth is there are no magic words. There are no shortcuts, and there is no new technology that makes girls want sex more than ever before.
There are only fundamentals, and guys who do them well. Make these fundamentals part of your daily routines, and watch your results, and your total happiness, skyrocket.
It's pure pickup karma. The more good you do for others selflessly, the more it comes back to you. Stop worrying about how to get her home that night or destroy her boyfriend or overcome her socialized resistance.
Do it for her, not for you. You will get more comfortable and more confident, and then when you see that smoking hottie across the bar and know you have to wade through a see of stalkers to get to her, you'll have your mojo running high and a real smile on your face.
Mojo makes you a superhero. Learn to build it and bank it, and you can do anything.
posted by Sean Messenger at 5:49 PM Dating Advice for Men