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The Blowout Ejection Plan


posted by Sean Messenger at 4:29 PM

At PickUp101, we teach a simple technique to use when you feel that the group you are talking to is no longer interested in talking to you that requires no coordination with others and no planning.

Just look at the group, gently place you hand on the arm of the person closest to you, and say something like:

"Hey, it was cool talking. I've got to catch up with my friends. Maybe I'll see you later."

Then leave. That's it. No lies (well, it's not always strictly true that you have to run right now to find your friends, but it's always socially appropriate) and no games. To the group it appears as though you have chosen to walk away, and to anyone watching it looks the same. You are polite, you are classy, and you let them know you are in control, and cool enough to keep them comfortable.

It also lets you leave on a high note. You're not scurrying away because they 'blew you out.' You are clearly stating that you choose to move on instead.

You are NOT the asshole who overstays his welcome (just think back on any house guest you ever had who just would not leave, and you will instinctively know why that is the very last thing you want to be.

What you say is very influential over what you think. If you say this, then you start to believe it. If you use any kind of trick to extricate yourself, you'll always feel a little sneaky.

When in doubt, look for the simplest solutions.


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posted by Sean Messenger at 4:29 PM Dating Advice for Men


Blogger Chris-P said...

That's so true, alot of times a set may not have the social skills to keep the interaction going. You can't stand there and look like an ass. The (it was nice talking with you i've got to get back to my friends) while touching her shoulder is very classy.

11:57 AM, July 21, 2006  
Anonymous picky-picasso said...

I'd like to add one for if SHE blows YOU out with the classic "I've got to go to the bathroom" (which may not be a blow out at all.)

"It's right over there. You can walk me to the bar on the way."

You walk with her, and hopefully (if you are assumptive) she takes you to the bar. You then send her on her way, and you look MUCH better than you would have if she left you standing where you were. Generally the women at the bar are fresh now, and they've all seen you escorted by a presumably attractive girl.


7:39 PM, January 24, 2007  

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